I love resolutions. I love the idea of starting over, forgetting yesterday and just starting over. In 2012 I learned that I get a fresh start every day. I can forget the failures of yesterday and simply move on. Live and Learn.
Mostly this was in terms of eating and working out. I can’t remember my exact weight goal for the year, but I am deeming 2012 a successful year for losing weight/getting fit. I also was supposed to read one book a month. I did really well pretty early on (thank you Hunger Games), but I fell off the bandwagon eventually.
This year I don’t want to focus on specifics, how many books to read/pounds to lose/miles to run, instead I want to focus on living. I want to learn to be. Not to be better/smaller/faster/fitter/smarter/more successful. I just want to be. I want to live well. I don’t want to beat myself up when I don’t meet a personal goal. I don’t want to dive into depression headlong when my weight doesn’t budge for a month. I don’t want to walk around feeling like a failure cause I could have been nicer, kinder, more gracious or more loving. I want to be. I want to enjoy this journey through life not ticking the imaginary success and failure log I have running in my head. I want to accept grace and mercy and give it freely in return.
Two thousand thirteen is the year I dive into a relationship with the Lord because I want to, not because I’m supposed to. It’s going to be a year that I allow myself to have close relationships not because isolation is the gateway to spiritual death, but because I like people and I’m not going to be afraid anymore. I’m going to have self-confidence, not because I think I’m amazing and have so much to offer so many people, but because to live a life under the security blanket of insecurity isn’t how I’m created to live.
This year I plan on living.